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Grace Leanne's story   — Nancy

I lost my first baby to GBS on September 6th, 1997. I was 41 weeks pregnant when I went into labor. I thought everything was going just wonderful and that we were on our way to the hospital to bring home our wonderful little girl. When I arrived at the hospital, they discovered that I had a fever and immediately put me on the IV antibiotics. They knew I was GBS positive and took the appropriate steps with me. After a few hours with the baby's heart rate starting to not respond to my contractions they did a pH sample on her head (which was now showing through my cervix). It came back so acidic, that they thought the test was wrong. They did another with the same results. So acidic that it showed she was near death. They rushed me into the operating room, and did an emergency c-section. I was awake and I saw my poor baby girl rushed to the table to receive CPR. They then knocked me out with something in my IV. When I awoke, they told me that my baby was gravely ill. She was life flight to Portland OR, about 2 hours away. I got to see her on her way to the helicopter, and I got to reach into her incubator and hold her foot. It was the only part of her that I could reach and without some horrible tube sticking out of her. I went to see her the next morning. The doctors put me on some potent pain relief, and we took the 2 hour drive. I knew it would be my only chance to see her alive. When we got there, they took us into a private room and told us that she had no brain activity. I was going to have to make the decision to take her off of the machines. I visited with her for a while and got to stroke her head and hair. I could feel that she was not really there.

I knew the little girl that had been inside me, was not in this poor little body any longer. At least she was not there to feel the pain of all the tubes and blood tests done to her. I never had to make the decision to stop life support. She died on her own early the next morning. I remember lying in my hospital room listening to the phone ring all night, just waiting for the one call for us. It came at about 3:00 am on September 6th 1997. Just two days after I went into the hospital to meet my first baby! It was the most horrible time of my life. We had been married for 11 years when we finally decided that we wanted children. I was 32 years old when I delivered her. I almost felt crazy with the thought of never having a baby after my sweet little girl died. I was so scared to ever try again. I could not think of my life without a baby anymore though, so on February 14th, 1998 we became pregnant again. I have since given birth (by scheduled c-section) to a lovely little boy. He was born at 38 weeks on October 23rd, 1998. I am almost happy again, thanks to my sweet Jared. I will always miss my baby Grace but I know she is really still here with us. The hardest part now is seeing Jared develop into a growing boy and to really know what we missed with Grace.

miscarriage in 1996
mom to Grace 9/4/97-9/6/97 (due to a GBS infection)
mom to Jared 10/23/98 (GBS negative and healthy!!)

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